Mütiilation

Ahhhhhh, Mütiilation. Willy Roussel. I don't have any idea what he's like in person but his resume of musical endeavors is like a virtual playlist for the the Ninth Circle of Hell. I'm currently listening to Vampires of Black Imperial Blood, the track is "Ravens of My Funeral." The vast majority of my friends and even family would not be able to take 2 minutes of this, let alone listen to it all day long.

Deathspell Omega are the thinking man's Satanic Black Metal. Mütiilation.... well, there's definitely thought involved.... but it feels more heart and soul driven than brain driven. This is a man who, at the very least, gives the impression of being the most hate-filled human being ever born. The lyrics are sometimes awkward, due most likely to his not being a native English speaker. But the message they convey is so powerful.

Allegedly, he was given the boot from Les Legions Noires for drug abuse, if not outright addiction. I have no idea if this is true. But it wouldn't surprise me. The music, lyrics and voice sound like a ritual self-immolation that he hopes will annihilate God Himself. So much loathing and hate and anguish. Does this beg the question, "Why do you listen to something like that?"

I know I have some parts inside me, some selves, that are boiling over with self-hate, Christ-hate, life-hate. The writer Cioran said something along the lines of how good it would be to die by throwing oneself into an infinite void. That's what Mütiilation does for me. I am destroyed, ruined, cast down to the Eternal Pit, my memory lost for all time. A longing for complete and utter obliteration. In my daily life, I don't live exactly like this. Not sure Willy R. does either, though he creates the perfect soundtrack for it. But... the hellish places in my heart scream along with him, "Destroy your life for Satan!" I actually had that carved into my arm at one point, until the scars disappeared.

 The Bible tells us some things about Satan. Others have written of the Evil One's nature, from St. Augustine to Milton to the Rolling Stones. The concept I keep coming back to in my own mind and my own heart is the sense of void-ness. It's like when someone says that darkness is just the lack of light and evil is just the lack of good. Satan is the void where all the things the average John Q. Public finds wholesome and welcoming and comforting disappear, not even in flames or something else dramatic. No, they just get tossed aside and blink out like a light bulb being turned off. All that's left is negativity and lack. Lack of something, anything, to hang your hopes and dreams on. (This point would be disputed by those who see Satan in a more Luciferian frame, as being the bringer of the light of free thought, free will, etc. And I won't deny that there is in that something that I do agree with. But, there is little of that kind of positivity in the music or words of Mütiilation, so, even if you don't agree with this and the following negative sounding thoughts on the nature of Satan, just accept it as what I get out of the music.)

The world is a vulture feasting on hope and the butcher of dreams. The world that was allegedly redeemed a couple millennia ago is a carcass. We all die and no one truly knows if there is a point or a meaning or anything resembling what the various religions of the world would have us believe. Satan doesn't need faith, he washes away any lingering stains of faith your spirit may still have. This point is sure to find argument among Satanists who are essentially reverse-Christians and believe wholeheartedly that Satan is a fallen angel dwelling in some metaphysical Hell, lording it over his fellow fallen. Satan can't be pinned down like that. Satan is the ultimate anti. Anti-all. Satan hates Christianity but doesn't mind when Christianity oppresses people or starts a war. Same with any creed. When one devotes oneself to the concept of Satan, it is to a principle of complete negation, a theological form of suicide. Not all my selves are devoted to this concept, as evidenced by the huge fight I've waged against my various mental health demons. But some of my selves... oh, they like it very much.

I don't know what Willy R.'s personal thoughts on Satanism are. I don't know if he believes in what he writes or not. I don't know him in any way, shape or form. And judging someone from their lyrics and some interview snippets isn't exactly a good thing to attempt to do, as it will generally lead you far astray. But this is about what I personally have gotten from the music of Mütiilation. It is holy in its unholiness. It is the light bulb flicking out at the end of all our lives when, wherever we may go from here, all that was treasured in this world is irretrievably snatched from us. Sure, we may meet again in some great beyond. But there is a void inside us all, whispering doubt, hissing that it's all a cosmic sham, that we've been tricked. When you lie alone at night (or in the daytime like me) and wonder if anyone is hearing your prayers, rest assured that Satan is. And he may smash them bloody in his fists but.... at least that much shows he cares in his own special way.