Meditating Again

I've been meditating regularly again. I've been trying to discover the Black Flame within myself, the Black Flame of the Left Hand Path, the Black Flame of the Adversarial Gods and Goddesses, the thing that can make all of us deities in our own right. The book I've been reading, The Bible of the Adversary, written by the founder of the Order of Phosporus and the Church of the Adversarial Light, describes Luciferian meditation as being focused on disunion rather than union with the universe, as in Buddhist meditation. Disunion with the cosmos signifies rebellion against the accepted, orthodox order of things, making oneself a being who carves out destiny despite the odds against it, who rules his or her domain absolutely without any mandates from God.

This has been an interesting path so far. I will pursue it further. I need to learn more. Meditation is good in and of itself but it can also be a springboard for magick. Meditation can lead one to a place where accessing higher levels of consciousness and higher states of being is possible. Gnosis, the point of absolute single-minded concentration on one object, the object of one's desires, is accessible through steady and determined mediation. In Luciferian meditation and gnosis, one is flowing against the stream of the universe, struggling to break free of personal, societal, religious and moral boundaries. It goes against everything we are brought up with and told as children to do. But there is great power in it. I personally believe there are adversarial spirits in this universe and that they respond to the soul who goes against the spiritual grain. Like the Luciferians, I do not believe in worshiping them, merely attaining what they have attained. Through meditation, I am coming to see that perhaps there is a way to carry on this void of consciousness into further life in the spirit. I hate the spirit/matter duality, so I will consider spirit as merely one manifestation of matter, but there is something animating the universe and living beings in particular. It might as well be called spirit.

I have a lot of research left to do, a lot of meditating and magick to practice, a lot of invocations and mantras and visualizations ahead of me. I still do not know if I will adopt this path and stick to it for any length of time. I change spiritual opinions more than most people change their socks. But it is helping me to deal with a very stressful time in my life and giving me an inner power that other people have sensed in me but it has taken quite a long time for me to sense in myself. I feel, at the moment, like I truly am the God of my life, the Set, the Ahriman, the Lucifer, walking my own road, doing what needs to be done, living life to the fullest, embracing darkness and reaching for light. I wish to use this lifetime to ascend to something higher, something greater, something divine. If I set my mind to it, nothing can stop me.